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The Loneliest Fundament

by Joe Molenaar

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1.
2.
It's a still-life watercolor Of a now-late afternoon As the sun shines through the curtain lace And shadows wash the room And we sit and drink our coffee Couched in our indifference Like shells upon the shore You can hear the ocean roar In the dangling conversation And the superficial sighs The borders of our lives And you read your Emily Dickinson And I my Robert Frost And we note our place with book markers That measure what we've lost Like a poem poorly written We are verses out of rhythm Couplets out of rhyme In syncopated time And the dangling conversation And the superficial sighs Are the borders of our lives Yes, we speak of things that matter With words that must be said Can analysis be worthwhile? Is the theater really dead? And how the room has softly faded And I only kiss your shadow I cannot feel your hand You're a stranger now unto me Lost in the dangling conversation And the superficial sighs In the borders of our lives
3.
at the end of the rainbow i'd hoped you were waiting there as i rip the seeds from the ground and throw them in the air the skin on my palms begins to callus and crack oh, will it all be different when i come back? take me to the edge of the world tonight, my love i want you to forget me there so below as above i'll always remember your face as a stain in the black would it look different if i came back?
4.
was that a gunshot? wear that red lipstick it makes you look so sexy baby, baby, baby was that a gunshot? forget to shave your legs intentional played out it's so fucking played out
5.
a predator calls out piercing the night releasing a salty discharge from his eyes and the shadow of a moth passes over my testes carved from marble dusted to decay covered in fingerprints smooth on the hands of God being held by them is death upon arrival there's nothing else after bliss but with someone you love you were too caught up how can we stay so close? just keep a message: i lucked out sweetheart
6.
Liquidarian 01:12
heard about the statesman's death the message given to ben and seth like i said i wasn't prepared for this i wasn't prepared for this
7.
now there's coke in the microwave to hide and she tells me she loves somebody new my lips go numb now when I kiss you Mother, please take me for a ride she was my salvation on that eleventh day i wish when we were lucky I had found any word to say alas it's no use when so many years have passed and she's forgotten to remember that I exist how will she know her name is carved into my wrist? blood on display when sails ascend the mast she pushes me off the edge and i fall into the sea can you ever think of anybody else next to me?

about

This is a compilation of songs I have recorded as voice memos on my phone but either forgot what I was playing in the recording or I am simply never going to record a real version of the song. Some are lost tracks from the album I was writing from 2019 into 2020 and some are just other songs that don't necessarily fit into an album setting. It's a rarities/B-sides concept.

It takes a long time for two colors to displace themselves from one another.

Dedicated to CFS

credits

released January 31, 2022

All songs and lyrics written by Joe Molenaar except track 2, The Dangling Conversation, written by Paul Simon 1966, Columbia Records.

All songs recorded in the Hot Mess
via Voice Memos August - December 2020 and July - October 2021
Except the Dangling Conversation recorded in the Emerald Grove
via Voice Memos 17 March, 2021

Cover photograph shot on Ilford Ortho Plus 80 ISO by Joe Molenaar, artificially recolored.

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Joe Molenaar San Diego, California

These are the memoirs of a synesthesiac.
Keep calm and Warrior Smile

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